We got a call from the vet yesterday saying that fifteen year old Tortellini (called Nini, since a two year old Miss M couldn't manage the whole thing) is suffering from kidney failure. Sad news, but don't try to tell him that. Just before I took these pictures I was petting him and playing tragic but he's having none of it; he looked at me as if to say "What?!?"When I considered writing this blog I thought of other people who have used words like "precious" and "beloved" to describe their cats. Not gonna work. Nini may be precious to me and he is certainly beloved by all the family, but his true essence is the "grumpy old man" and nothing, not even impending death is going to change that.
This is where the old man has been camping out for the last few days, finding refuge it seems in my newly straightened office - or perhaps its the blanket that he loves.
Tortellini and his now departed sister Ravioli were the first pets The Hubby and I brought home all those years ago when we first moved in together. We (thought we) wanted a dog but we "settled" for what the landlady would allow - two cats. That act of the Universe has been one of our most loving twists of fate. Now, 3 homes later and a lifetime away, Nini is the last vestige of that life before. He is the last living thread that winds through our early years of living together.
He's had a good run and in true Monty Python-esque fashion The Hubby and I keep saying "He's not dead yet! ...I think I'll go for a walk now"(from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.) Still, his leaving will be sad. I have to avoid the temptation of making him something he isn't in his last months though. I have to let him be the grumpy old man that he is, until he isn't anymore.
(just for good measure, two questions to ponder today...)
Why do we sometimes try so hard to sugar-coat spirituality?
How do you hold your grief?
3 comments:
I am a loss for words, I think I mostly want you to know that I hear you. I pray for a peaceful, sweet transistion for your sweet/grumpy kitty and that you will be able to tell hiim everything you want him to know before he passes on to the next life. With a hug, Beverly
I'm sorry to hear about your cat. I hope you can cherish the time left with him and it does already seem that you are. Still I'm sending you and Mr Grumpy the same kind of comfort that a favorite blanket offers.
So sorry to hear about Nini. It's always so hard when our pets get sick. Comforting to know that he doesn't give a hoot though! Living life as always! That's great!
I love your description of his personality. Every cat is just as different as every human, I think. Mine are affectionate angels. They are still cats of course, still do their thing, but they need their loving every day and are generally really well behaved. One of them less obedient than the other!
Cats become so important to us. Thank you for sharing your story with Nini.
Annie
xxx
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